my daughter just turned 8 last week and when I picked her up she said “dad you make mummy very sad when you come to get me”
those aren’t her words. she’s never talked like that before. it’s like she’s been coached what to say
has anyone else dealt with this? kids suddenly using adult phrases that don’t sound like them at all? she used to run to the car excited to see me and now she’s just… different. distant
I don’t know if I should call her out on it or just ignore it? part of me wants to ask where she heard that but I don’t want to put her in the middle more than she already is
this is killing me. she’s 8 years old and already being used as a messenger
God this hits close to home. my 7yo came out with “daddy, you hurt mommy’s feelings when you took us away” last month and I knew immediately those weren’t his words. The phrasing was way too mature and he’d never expressed anything like that before.
I didn’t call him out on it because my lawyer said that puts kids in an impossible position - they’re already caught between us and questioning them makes it worse. What I did was just say “I’m sorry you’re worried about mommy’s feelings. I love you and I’m always happy to see you” and left it at that.
It’s brutal though. These aren’t their thoughts and watching them deliver messages they don’t understand… my heart breaks for your little girl. She’s probably confused too about why she feels like she has to say these things. Document the exact words and date - my attorney says this stuff matters in court.